20 random anecdotes from the collection
On exam rightfully.
- A Professor, by the way, pony is my property, but you her(its) have withdrawn without observance corresponding to процессуально-legal procedure!
- Eh, young person! I teacher, rather then policeman. Can Not I, really, beat you on bud before that what withdrew the pony!
The Night before exam. The telephone call раздается In apartment of the professor.
Annoyed sleepy-eyed voice:
- That, sleep, infect?
- But we teach.
On exam student does not know the answer nor on one question.
Lost patience professor begins to holler:
- Yes after all you ass! (Address to one of the assistent) Bring me, please, armload network!
- But me cup coffee, please.
Exam at the university.
Question for "5", what's my name?
- The question is "4", what do we give?
- The question is "3", what color is the textbook?
Voice from the back of the desk:
- In the wall, the bastard!
- You were in armies?
- No, but that?
- Yes so, can make.
The Help to slim down!Undertake your dinners and suppers. The Student Petrov.
Hа wall in student table:
- Has Eaten - give second!
- A Best way to becalm the woman, when she in hysterics,- explains the psychiatrist on lectures student, - kiss her(it).
The Question from common-room:
- Say the professor, but as more simply bring her(it) before hysterics?
DOS programmer in ZAGS quizzical asks:"But that, name child can be longer 8 letters?"
The Brother brother: - a Stake vertebra parent!
Kolya bewilderring: - As I him ring;phone?! Beside them modem no!
The Girl - a programmer goes to tram, reads the book.The Old woman looks at girl, looks at book, is baptized and dread dashes out on the following stop.
the Girl read the book "Language of the Hell".
Programmer reads the son a fairy tale:
- And became the oldster to clique the goldfish...
- a Pope(pa), but why he cliqued the fish?
- Since mouse then was not yet.
The American school for gifted children, 1970, lesson of the informatics...
- But now, babes, what program you wanted to write, when subgrow? Here is you, Peter?
- I have written such steep utility, which quickly so cured winchester from error!
- Good lad, Peter! But you, Eugene?
- But I have done such program, which quickly and without error compressed the files!
- Clever person, Eugene! But you, Bill, what keep quiet?
- Well, nothing-nothing! ... Will you all quickly, will you without error...
The Announcement in Internet:Verse winchester. The Hard disks not to offer!
The Programmer with wife went to supermarket.Having Done all necessary bulk purchase, they left on street, and wife has said:
- Flock here and see in both for these ten bags while I similar and search for the taxi.
When wife returned, that has seen the freaked out husband, moving bags with place on place.
- You has said that here ten bags, but I considered only 9!
- But their was ten!
- No, let's together to consider: 0, 1, 2, 3......
Vovochka has been late in school and speaks the tutoress:
- Helped the grandmother to move to the following level!
- A Pope(pa), pope(pa)!But what is a "Format C: complete"?
The Programmer communicates with person:
- In progress! Five years back sat on "Sinkler", now sit on Pentium, but that will else be in five years? Simply fig!
- But that will? Change you in five years on some fig else. Only when will change, see in mirror on its back, on imprint of the keys. Here is then fig!
- Beside my grandmothers is hitherto kept Gospel 1804 publishing!
- Uh you! Probably, else on five inch diskettes?